Senior year of college. I can officially say I have grown into the relationship with my mother that I love her, I need her guidance, we can talk about life and relationships and work, and I appreciate her.
I wouldn't say my mom and I had the mother-daughter feuds in high school that some mother-daughter pairs go through with rebellion and screaming at each other, calling each other names. I definitely saw that and still do with people my age, but we did have our arguments over the years and times when I would not talk to her or she annoyed the hell out of me. OK, there are times she still does and I know there are arguments to come still. But over the past year I can see the change in our relationship that has happened as I've matured. I am so very excited to graduate, move out on my own, start my career, travel the country and world, but a small part inside of me is thinking, "Can't I take her along?" My mom and I do a lot together that I didn't notice until I got a Twitter and it's always, "Watching a movie with mom, Mom's cooking dinner.. yummm :), out shopping with Mom, Dinner with Mom, running errands with Mom"
Although I live on campus during the school year, this semester I spend more time at home because the hospital I'm working in is 20 minutes vs. 1 hour distance. Maybe it's the few months I know we have left together as solely the two of us together sharing the same address that makes me realize.... damn it, what am I going to do without her? My 22 year old self doesn't know how to make BBQ chicken or mashed potatoes the way she does! What if I need to cry, who's going to sit there and hug me and know exactly what I need to hear to feel better because she's been doing it for years?
This is when I realize that I finally can say I appreciate my mother, who she is, what she has done for me, all I've put her through, that she is her own person, and the role she plays in my life.
Thanks Mom! I love you!